October 10, 2007
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
I think that warmth and intelligence are an interesting combination of words. I have not heard them mentioned together very often. Together, they offer a different perspective on living life. Of course we all want to do the intelligent thing in life and at the very least, we don't want to look like we are clueless about what to do. Bertrand Russell said, "The main thing needed to make men happy is intelligence."
My definition of happiness is an inner state of well being that enables you to profit from your highest thoughts, intelligence, wisdom, awareness, common sense, emotions, health, and spiritual values. What happens when we look at intelligence with the added aspect of warmth to it? I think that being a warm person is a very important trait to have in life.
I am sure you have dealt with people that seem to be cold and non-caring. Sometimes people are referred to as cold hearted, or are described as being cold and distant. They seem cold and distant to your needs. They may appear to be indifferent to what you are saying or just not connected to you at all. How does that make you feel? It does not make you feel warm and fuzzy, right? No, it doesn't make you feel good.
Daniel Goleman the author of Emotional Intelligence, has said, "Self-awareness--recognizing a feeling as it happens--is the keystone of emotional intelligence. The ability to monitor feelings from moment to moment is crucial to psychological insight and self-understanding. An inability to notice our true feelings leaves us at their mercy. People with a greater certainty about their feelings are better pilots of their lives, having a surer sense of how they really feel about personal decisions from whom to marry to what job to take."
I think that getting along with others is part of our intelligence. It may be our emotional intelligence, but it is all about how smart we are. Why don't we learn to warm up more? Let's make it our business to become a little more warm and friendly. I think it will make you appear smarter and help you become more accepted by other people as well. Let's go practice being warm and intelligent by being warm and friendly, starting now!
Our next meeting is a presentation by Sarah Shapiro, the daughter of the beloved and famous, Norman Cousins. We are privileged to have Sarah as our guest speaker for our next Happiness Club meeting on Thursday, October 11th. Sarah lives in Israel and is visiting our group to meet you and speak about her father. Sarah is an author and her most recent books are Wish I Were Here, and A Gift Passed Along, (Artscroll.)
Norman Cousins knew happiness very well and he knew it at a very deep level. "Our frustrations also arise from the mistaken belief that the complexities of life preclude happiness -- that life is something from which we must flee to be happy." These words of Norman Cousins show the magnitude of his awareness of happiness. Norman also said, "Life is an adventure in forgiveness."
The meeting is on Thursday, October 11, from 7:00 - 9:00 P.M. at the Fairfield Public Library, in the Rotary Room at 1080 Old Post Road, Fairfield. Accommodations will permit only the first 120 people to be admitted. No reservations accepted. Don't miss this valuable talk. Admission is free; everyone is welcome. Meet some great people using happiness in their lives. Come on down, get connected, and step out with joy in your life! Looking forward to seeing you.
As Norman Cousins said: "Illness is not a laughing matter. Perhaps it ought to be. Laughter is a form of internal jogging. It moves your internal organs around. It enhances respiration. It is an igniter of great expectations.”
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Friday, November 09, 2007
Become a Better You!
October 24, 2007
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
This past week I saw Joel Osteen and his wife Victoria on 60 Minutes, Larry King, Fox News, and Glenn Beck. I understand they were on a number of other shows as well. Barbara Walters has named Joel one of the 10 Most Fascinating People. Joel Osteen is the senior pastor of Lakewood Church in Texas, the largest church in the United States. His church was the former home of the National Basketball Association's Houston Rockets. He converted the sports arena, known as the Compaq Center, into the Lakewood Church in July 2005. His wife, Victoria is also a pastor. Joel, now age 42, took over the church when his father, John, died in January 1999. 30,000 people attend Lakewood Church every Sunday.
Joel has just published his second book entitled, Become a Better You. Joel's first book, Your Best Life Now has been on the New York Times best selling book list. It is also on my 20 best happiness books, listed on my web site. Chapter 7 is called: Choose To Be Happy!
About six years ago, I happened to tune into a TV program on Sunday morning. I did not know who the person on TV was, because I had never heard of Joel Osteen at the time. I was immediately captivated by his message that day because he was speaking about happiness. The title of his talk that Sunday was Choose to Be Happy! I could not believe my eyes and ears. Here was a preacher talking about happiness. Joel said, "The bottom line is if you're gong to be happy, you need to make a decision to be happy right now. Happiness does not depend on your circumstances; it depends on your will. It's a choice that you make." Now you know why I love Joel Osteen.
You can see Joel on TV every Sunday morning, he is on hundreds of stations across the country. The show is watched by tens of millions of people in more than a hundred nations worldwide. In Connecticut, he has half-hour shows starting early in the morning which run until 9:30 AM on different channels. His message is always an important and positive one with no gloom and doom, no hell and damnation. Joel tells you how to deal with important issues in your life. Joel always delivers a message to help you cope with emotional issues and create the right attitude to live your life. I hear him mention happiness in almost every "sermon." Joel said, "To develop a habit of happiness, you must retrain those negative responses."
I have found people of all faiths, not just Christians, listen to Joel to hear his positive messages. In all the years I have seen Joel on TV, his basic format is the same. He always starts the program by telling a joke. The congregation remains standing for the joke and then Joel leads them in a 21-second bible vow. He never asks for money on the air. After delivering an inspiring and motivating talk he closes the broadcast with a 7-second prayer. Joel said, "Make a decision that you are going to live your life happily."
Joel is 42 years old and is doing an outstanding job of teaching people in the world to practice responsibility by practicing emotional control. Joel is showing us joy, peace, love and happiness in every message he gives. In an interview at Beliefnet.com, Laura Sheahen asked Joel: How does God want us to live our lives? Joel's answer was: "He want us to live our lives happy"
Joel said, "God does not want you to sacrifice your happiness to keep somebody else happy. At first brush, that may sound a little selfish, but there's a tenuous balance here. Your first priority is to take care of yourself. To do so, you must recognize that some people are still not going to be happy no matter what you do for them, no matter how nice you are, no matter how much time and energy you give them. They have their own issues with which to deal or things inside that they need to resolve."
All the quotes in this article are from Joel's new book. I recommend that you read Become a Better You: 7 Keys to Improving Your Life Every Day. The 7 keys are 1. Keep pressing forward. 2. Be positive toward yourself. 3. Develop better relationships. 4. Form better habits. 5. Embrace the place where you are. 6. Develop your inner life. 7. Stay passionate about life.
Joel says, "Friend, life is too short to go through it being controlled and manipulated by people who refuse to make good choices on their own. Please understand: You are not responsible for everybody else's happiness. You are responsible for your own happiness. If people are controlling you, it's not their fault; it's your fault. You must learn to set some boundaries."
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
See what's new at AOL.com and Make AOL Your Homepage.
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
This past week I saw Joel Osteen and his wife Victoria on 60 Minutes, Larry King, Fox News, and Glenn Beck. I understand they were on a number of other shows as well. Barbara Walters has named Joel one of the 10 Most Fascinating People. Joel Osteen is the senior pastor of Lakewood Church in Texas, the largest church in the United States. His church was the former home of the National Basketball Association's Houston Rockets. He converted the sports arena, known as the Compaq Center, into the Lakewood Church in July 2005. His wife, Victoria is also a pastor. Joel, now age 42, took over the church when his father, John, died in January 1999. 30,000 people attend Lakewood Church every Sunday.
Joel has just published his second book entitled, Become a Better You. Joel's first book, Your Best Life Now has been on the New York Times best selling book list. It is also on my 20 best happiness books, listed on my web site. Chapter 7 is called: Choose To Be Happy!
About six years ago, I happened to tune into a TV program on Sunday morning. I did not know who the person on TV was, because I had never heard of Joel Osteen at the time. I was immediately captivated by his message that day because he was speaking about happiness. The title of his talk that Sunday was Choose to Be Happy! I could not believe my eyes and ears. Here was a preacher talking about happiness. Joel said, "The bottom line is if you're gong to be happy, you need to make a decision to be happy right now. Happiness does not depend on your circumstances; it depends on your will. It's a choice that you make." Now you know why I love Joel Osteen.
You can see Joel on TV every Sunday morning, he is on hundreds of stations across the country. The show is watched by tens of millions of people in more than a hundred nations worldwide. In Connecticut, he has half-hour shows starting early in the morning which run until 9:30 AM on different channels. His message is always an important and positive one with no gloom and doom, no hell and damnation. Joel tells you how to deal with important issues in your life. Joel always delivers a message to help you cope with emotional issues and create the right attitude to live your life. I hear him mention happiness in almost every "sermon." Joel said, "To develop a habit of happiness, you must retrain those negative responses."
I have found people of all faiths, not just Christians, listen to Joel to hear his positive messages. In all the years I have seen Joel on TV, his basic format is the same. He always starts the program by telling a joke. The congregation remains standing for the joke and then Joel leads them in a 21-second bible vow. He never asks for money on the air. After delivering an inspiring and motivating talk he closes the broadcast with a 7-second prayer. Joel said, "Make a decision that you are going to live your life happily."
Joel is 42 years old and is doing an outstanding job of teaching people in the world to practice responsibility by practicing emotional control. Joel is showing us joy, peace, love and happiness in every message he gives. In an interview at Beliefnet.com, Laura Sheahen asked Joel: How does God want us to live our lives? Joel's answer was: "He want us to live our lives happy"
Joel said, "God does not want you to sacrifice your happiness to keep somebody else happy. At first brush, that may sound a little selfish, but there's a tenuous balance here. Your first priority is to take care of yourself. To do so, you must recognize that some people are still not going to be happy no matter what you do for them, no matter how nice you are, no matter how much time and energy you give them. They have their own issues with which to deal or things inside that they need to resolve."
All the quotes in this article are from Joel's new book. I recommend that you read Become a Better You: 7 Keys to Improving Your Life Every Day. The 7 keys are 1. Keep pressing forward. 2. Be positive toward yourself. 3. Develop better relationships. 4. Form better habits. 5. Embrace the place where you are. 6. Develop your inner life. 7. Stay passionate about life.
Joel says, "Friend, life is too short to go through it being controlled and manipulated by people who refuse to make good choices on their own. Please understand: You are not responsible for everybody else's happiness. You are responsible for your own happiness. If people are controlling you, it's not their fault; it's your fault. You must learn to set some boundaries."
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
See what's new at AOL.com and Make AOL Your Homepage.
Thursday, August 09, 2007
Do Great Things!
June 13, 2007
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
We can do nothing better than make a positive difference in the world. To do great things, just think about what needs to be done in order to leave this world better than you found it. Each of us has different thoughts on what that is and when we do it with happiness, we empower ourselves to accomplish great things.
A group of teenagers from the Happy Club of Stamford, CT conceived and coordinated a Memorial Garden in Fort Stamford. It was a beautiful day on Tuesday, June 5 as many people gathered to dedicate this project. The mayor of Stamford, Dannel Malloy gave a wonderful speech dedicating the garden and acknowledging the Teenagers who made a positive difference by working together to create this project. The event was broadcast on television and the press interviewed the teen leaders for the wonderful work they had accomplished.
Trees were planted; red, white and blue flowers surrounded a bronze plaque commemorating our soldiers who gave their lives in Iraq. The local veterans groups, a Marine Corps color guard, the boy scouts and the garden club were in attendance.
In the six months that the Happy Club for teens has been in existence, it has completed eight projects that serve others. Some of these projects included collecting goods for the local food bank, interacting with senior citizens in an assisted living center, making and serving lunch to recovering drug addicts and people with mental illness, selling baked goods and other items to benefit an animal care facility and helping to set up for the March of Dimes Walk-a-Thon.
Kasey Glass and Sami Stone are two of the teens that started this Happy Club with the assistance of Dr. Cynthia Barnett. The club has 35 high school aged youths from Connecticut, New York and New Jersey representing over 15 schools. I spoke to a few of the teens and asked them how they felt about serving others. They all agreed that it was the greatest feeling they could imagine.
I congratulate the wonderful teen members of our Happy Club. Our teens are a shining example for people of all ages. Volunteering their time and their efforts both physically and mentally, provides people with a good example of being happy and serving others. The members of the teen Happy Club have become role models for people much older than they are. Our youth is showing everyone how to be happy and spread that good feeling to others by serving people using happiness as a power tool.
The Happy Club teens are a great testament to our future leaders in this wonderful county called the United States of America and to the entire world. These teens are the leaders of a happy future for all of us. They are doing the most important work any human being can do. They are making a positive difference in their own lives and in the lives of everyone they touch.
If there is something that you feel needs to be done, than do it using the power of happiness. You might be telling yourself that you are only one person, what can I do? If you don't give up on your ideas, you can make a positive difference in this world by acting on what you want to see accomplished. If you just begin, events and people will come along to assist you in your efforts. Do nothing and nothing changes. It is time for you to make a positive difference. Do something big or something small, it does not matter at all, as long as you do something.
Getting out of yourself and thinking of others and the world around you is the best way to find freedom for your soul and to experience enduring happiness. The happiness these teens have found is an everlasting happiness. Nothing will be able to take that feeling away from them. They are learning early in life that making a positive difference is the best thing they can do for themselves.
2,911 yeas ago, a man named Aristotle was born who stated these true words: "All men seek one goal: success or happiness. The only way to achieve true success is to express yourself completely in service to society."
At a Hospice recognition dinner, I heard a volunteer say: "I serve because it makes me feel happy." That was her whole speech. She accepted her award and sat down. A woman I was speaking to after a Happiness Club meeting told me she became happy after following what I had said at a meeting a few years ago. She told me that I said, if you are unhappy help someone else and you will find happiness. She said that she followed that advice and is now a volunteer and life has changed for the better.
Why serve others? It will make you feel fantastic! Do Great Things! Make your dreams come true and make a positive difference in your life. Everyone will benefit from you! If not you, who? If not now, when? Do it Now!
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
We can do nothing better than make a positive difference in the world. To do great things, just think about what needs to be done in order to leave this world better than you found it. Each of us has different thoughts on what that is and when we do it with happiness, we empower ourselves to accomplish great things.
A group of teenagers from the Happy Club of Stamford, CT conceived and coordinated a Memorial Garden in Fort Stamford. It was a beautiful day on Tuesday, June 5 as many people gathered to dedicate this project. The mayor of Stamford, Dannel Malloy gave a wonderful speech dedicating the garden and acknowledging the Teenagers who made a positive difference by working together to create this project. The event was broadcast on television and the press interviewed the teen leaders for the wonderful work they had accomplished.
Trees were planted; red, white and blue flowers surrounded a bronze plaque commemorating our soldiers who gave their lives in Iraq. The local veterans groups, a Marine Corps color guard, the boy scouts and the garden club were in attendance.
In the six months that the Happy Club for teens has been in existence, it has completed eight projects that serve others. Some of these projects included collecting goods for the local food bank, interacting with senior citizens in an assisted living center, making and serving lunch to recovering drug addicts and people with mental illness, selling baked goods and other items to benefit an animal care facility and helping to set up for the March of Dimes Walk-a-Thon.
Kasey Glass and Sami Stone are two of the teens that started this Happy Club with the assistance of Dr. Cynthia Barnett. The club has 35 high school aged youths from Connecticut, New York and New Jersey representing over 15 schools. I spoke to a few of the teens and asked them how they felt about serving others. They all agreed that it was the greatest feeling they could imagine.
I congratulate the wonderful teen members of our Happy Club. Our teens are a shining example for people of all ages. Volunteering their time and their efforts both physically and mentally, provides people with a good example of being happy and serving others. The members of the teen Happy Club have become role models for people much older than they are. Our youth is showing everyone how to be happy and spread that good feeling to others by serving people using happiness as a power tool.
The Happy Club teens are a great testament to our future leaders in this wonderful county called the United States of America and to the entire world. These teens are the leaders of a happy future for all of us. They are doing the most important work any human being can do. They are making a positive difference in their own lives and in the lives of everyone they touch.
If there is something that you feel needs to be done, than do it using the power of happiness. You might be telling yourself that you are only one person, what can I do? If you don't give up on your ideas, you can make a positive difference in this world by acting on what you want to see accomplished. If you just begin, events and people will come along to assist you in your efforts. Do nothing and nothing changes. It is time for you to make a positive difference. Do something big or something small, it does not matter at all, as long as you do something.
Getting out of yourself and thinking of others and the world around you is the best way to find freedom for your soul and to experience enduring happiness. The happiness these teens have found is an everlasting happiness. Nothing will be able to take that feeling away from them. They are learning early in life that making a positive difference is the best thing they can do for themselves.
2,911 yeas ago, a man named Aristotle was born who stated these true words: "All men seek one goal: success or happiness. The only way to achieve true success is to express yourself completely in service to society."
At a Hospice recognition dinner, I heard a volunteer say: "I serve because it makes me feel happy." That was her whole speech. She accepted her award and sat down. A woman I was speaking to after a Happiness Club meeting told me she became happy after following what I had said at a meeting a few years ago. She told me that I said, if you are unhappy help someone else and you will find happiness. She said that she followed that advice and is now a volunteer and life has changed for the better.
Why serve others? It will make you feel fantastic! Do Great Things! Make your dreams come true and make a positive difference in your life. Everyone will benefit from you! If not you, who? If not now, when? Do it Now!
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
HARVARD HAPPINESS!
May 16, 2007
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
I would like to introduce you to a great new book called: Happier: Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment, by Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D.
Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D., is one of Harvard University's most popular lecturers. More students have signed up to hear Ben-Shahar than any other teacher in Harvard's history. His classes attract 1,400 students per semester - approximately 20 percent of all Harvard graduates. He has been profiled on NPR and featured on CNN and CBS and in the New York Times and the Boston Globe. Ben-Shahar graduated from Harvard with a degree in philosophy and psychology. For the last ten years, he has been teaching personal and organizational excellence, leadership, ethics, and self-esteem.
The book Happier is short and very easy to read. It is a delightful and delicious assortment of valuable happiness insights and exercises. One thing about this book is that it allows you to understand happiness from a common sense approach. Ben-Shahar uses logic and reason to explain happiness in a straightforward way.
The book Happier will allow you to learn to become exactly what it says...happier. Another important aspect of the book Happier is that a teacher cannot make you happy. What you can do, is learn to be happy, from a person that has learned about being happy. Ben-Shahar understands happiness, because he boils happiness down to the simple things of life, as well as the meaning you have in your life. Ben-Shahar's students have discovered that they can become happier. Ben-Shahar has lead his class on positive psychology - a branch of psychology that combines the latest scientific research with good old common sense.
I would like to use the words of Ben Dean, Ph.D. to describe what positive psychology is: "Positive psychology is the scientific study of what goes right in life, from birth to death and at all stops in between. It is a newly christened approach within psychology that takes seriously the examination of that which makes life most worth living. Everyone's life has peaks and valleys, and positive psychology does not deny the valleys. What is good about life is as genuine as what is bad and, therefore, deserves equal attention from psychologists. Positive psychology as an explicit perspective has existed only since 1998, but enough relevant theory and research now exists to fill a textbook suitable for a semester-long college course."
The title of the book Happier actually reveals and delivers what it proposes. You will learn to live with daily joy if you read this book and actually practice and apply the words of wisdom in this book. Another key thing you will learn is that there really is a lasting fulfillment to life. Tal Ben-Shahar states: "Attaining lasting happiness requires that we enjoy the journey on our way toward a destination we deem valuable." You can learn to be happy and this book will give you the essentials to being happy.
To quote Dr, Tal Ben-Shahar: "The happiness revolution, which is about the change from material perception to happiness perception, is mental and therefore internal. No outside force is required to bring about this change. Conscious choice - the choice to focus on happiness as the ultimate currency - is the only agent."
Ben-Shahar states so perfectly: "The happiness revolution is about creating a society-wide paradigm shift to a higher level of consciousness, a higher plane of existence - to happiness perception. If most people in our society understand and internalize the ideas that happiness is not a zero-sum game and that pursuing it does not put us in competition with others, a quiet revolution will unfold where the pursuit of happiness and helping others attain higher levels of happiness will be two complimentary ends. When this revolution comes about, we will witness a society-wide abundance of not only happiness but also goodness."
Congratulations to Dr, Tal Ben-Shahar for writing the book Happier and contributing to the Happiness Revolution. His web site is: www.talbenshahar.com.
Dr, Tal Ben-Shahar might ask you questions like these. "Can you recognize that happiness, not money or prestige, is the ultimate currency - the currency by which we ought to take measure of our lives? Can you accept that you have a right to be happy?"
Our next Happiness Club meeting is Thursday, May 17, from 7:00-9:00 P.M. The presentation is "How I Got Involved with Happiness!" by Dr. Mark K. Setton. Dr. Setton is an Associate Professor of World Religions and Chairman of the Martial Arts Studies Program at the University of Bridgeport. Dr. Setton will speak about the importance of happiness. The meeting will be held in the Rotary Room, at the Fairfield Public Library, located at 1080 Old Post Road. There is no charge for the meeting and everyone's welcome!
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
I would like to introduce you to a great new book called: Happier: Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment, by Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D.
Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D., is one of Harvard University's most popular lecturers. More students have signed up to hear Ben-Shahar than any other teacher in Harvard's history. His classes attract 1,400 students per semester - approximately 20 percent of all Harvard graduates. He has been profiled on NPR and featured on CNN and CBS and in the New York Times and the Boston Globe. Ben-Shahar graduated from Harvard with a degree in philosophy and psychology. For the last ten years, he has been teaching personal and organizational excellence, leadership, ethics, and self-esteem.
The book Happier is short and very easy to read. It is a delightful and delicious assortment of valuable happiness insights and exercises. One thing about this book is that it allows you to understand happiness from a common sense approach. Ben-Shahar uses logic and reason to explain happiness in a straightforward way.
The book Happier will allow you to learn to become exactly what it says...happier. Another important aspect of the book Happier is that a teacher cannot make you happy. What you can do, is learn to be happy, from a person that has learned about being happy. Ben-Shahar understands happiness, because he boils happiness down to the simple things of life, as well as the meaning you have in your life. Ben-Shahar's students have discovered that they can become happier. Ben-Shahar has lead his class on positive psychology - a branch of psychology that combines the latest scientific research with good old common sense.
I would like to use the words of Ben Dean, Ph.D. to describe what positive psychology is: "Positive psychology is the scientific study of what goes right in life, from birth to death and at all stops in between. It is a newly christened approach within psychology that takes seriously the examination of that which makes life most worth living. Everyone's life has peaks and valleys, and positive psychology does not deny the valleys. What is good about life is as genuine as what is bad and, therefore, deserves equal attention from psychologists. Positive psychology as an explicit perspective has existed only since 1998, but enough relevant theory and research now exists to fill a textbook suitable for a semester-long college course."
The title of the book Happier actually reveals and delivers what it proposes. You will learn to live with daily joy if you read this book and actually practice and apply the words of wisdom in this book. Another key thing you will learn is that there really is a lasting fulfillment to life. Tal Ben-Shahar states: "Attaining lasting happiness requires that we enjoy the journey on our way toward a destination we deem valuable." You can learn to be happy and this book will give you the essentials to being happy.
To quote Dr, Tal Ben-Shahar: "The happiness revolution, which is about the change from material perception to happiness perception, is mental and therefore internal. No outside force is required to bring about this change. Conscious choice - the choice to focus on happiness as the ultimate currency - is the only agent."
Ben-Shahar states so perfectly: "The happiness revolution is about creating a society-wide paradigm shift to a higher level of consciousness, a higher plane of existence - to happiness perception. If most people in our society understand and internalize the ideas that happiness is not a zero-sum game and that pursuing it does not put us in competition with others, a quiet revolution will unfold where the pursuit of happiness and helping others attain higher levels of happiness will be two complimentary ends. When this revolution comes about, we will witness a society-wide abundance of not only happiness but also goodness."
Congratulations to Dr, Tal Ben-Shahar for writing the book Happier and contributing to the Happiness Revolution. His web site is: www.talbenshahar.com.
Dr, Tal Ben-Shahar might ask you questions like these. "Can you recognize that happiness, not money or prestige, is the ultimate currency - the currency by which we ought to take measure of our lives? Can you accept that you have a right to be happy?"
Our next Happiness Club meeting is Thursday, May 17, from 7:00-9:00 P.M. The presentation is "How I Got Involved with Happiness!" by Dr. Mark K. Setton. Dr. Setton is an Associate Professor of World Religions and Chairman of the Martial Arts Studies Program at the University of Bridgeport. Dr. Setton will speak about the importance of happiness. The meeting will be held in the Rotary Room, at the Fairfield Public Library, located at 1080 Old Post Road. There is no charge for the meeting and everyone's welcome!
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
15 Important Things For You're Happiness!
May 2, 2007
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
As Oprah says, "Everything begins with a decision."
1. Make The Happiness Decision. If you don't decide to be happy now, you won't do it later. The decision is an intention to create what you want. The decision draws events and people toward you that create positive outcomes. The decision makes you aware of things in yourself and around you. The happiness decision is your responsibility, not someone else's. No one can make you happy. God can't make you happy. Only your decision to be happy will allow you to respond to happiness and well being.
2. Understand The Value Of Happiness. If you don't value happiness, you won't have it. Happiness has great value. You will only benefit from it if you take the time to understand the value of it. You deserve to be happy, don't undervalue yourself.
3. Happiness Is Within You. Don't look to the outside for your happiness. Happiness is an inside job. Don't let any situation be more important to you than your happiness. Situations are neutral, even if you think they are good or bad. The way you think about the situation is what makes you unhappy. The way you think sets up your reaction, not the situation itself.
4. Think About Your Choices. What choices do you have now? It is all a matter of what choices you have available to you. Thinking about your problems is not thinking, it is obsessive negatively. Stop dwelling on your problems and start focusing on your solutions. Thinking is when you are creatively finding solutions and choices to eliminate your problem.
5. Be Grateful. Be thankful about something all the time. What are you grateful for now? Every day, think of three things that you are grateful for and write them down in a Gratitude Journal. It does not matter if you come up with the same thing once in awhile, just list three things every day. This has been scientifically proven to produce long term happiness results. Want some gratitude hints? Make your list simple things. For instance, be grateful you can see the paper you are writing on and that you have eyes to see. Be grateful you can pick up a pen and you have fingers and a hand to write with. You're alive, you can breath, you have food, you have shelter, keep looking for the simple things.
6. Watch Your Thinking. Our unhappiness is a result of our thinking. Don't think about what you don't want or what you don't like. Control your negativity or your thinking is going to make you unhappy. Think about your choices or what you want. Be aware of your thoughts as they drift in and don't let negative ones find a place to land in your mind. Don't give them a home; let them drift right back out again.
7. Learn Acceptance. Deal with change. When you don't accept something that has already happened, you create resistance to it. The resistance you are creating will cause you to suffer. The change has already happened and if their is nothing you can do about it, and you continue to resist it, you will make yourself unhappy.
8. Now Is Your Point Of Power For Happiness. Don't dwell in the past or worry about the future. If you're not focused on now, your awareness will be diminished. Accidents, mishaps and even crime are more likely to happen to you.
9. Use Happiness As Your Strategy. Use the power of happiness in your life when things don't go the way you think they should. This is important especially when things are not going your way, or you are not getting what you want, or when you are feeling sad or down. It is important to use that power all the time. Use it especially when things are not going well for you. The power of happiness helps you detach from outside events so you don't internalize your reactive thoughts into negative compulsive obsessive thinking.
10. Act As If You're Happy. If you "act as if"... than you will be happy. Acting as if you are happy allows your brain to believe you are happy and tells your body to respond in like manner. This way, your body is not stressed out and your brain is producing all the right chemicals and drugs to keep you stress free. Act as if and your new state of being will create a happy atmosphere for your psychology and physiology.
11. Practice, Practice & More Practice. Practice being happy now. Being happy is an empowering state of mind. Happiness is a skill. Like all skills, the more you practice it the better you get. Make happiness a habit by practicing it all the time. Happiness is like a muscle, if you don't use it you'll lose it. Practice being friendly and being non-judgmental. Practice being forgiving, being kind, being complimentary, being a giving person, and practice letting go.
12. Do Something For Someone Else. Pay someone a compliment, smile, bring someone a plant. A woman I know has been dealing with the loss of her husband's death. I met her carrying a plant with a beautiful flower. She said that she was on her way to give it to someone. I knew right there and then that she was on her way to recovering. I recognized she was coping better with the loss of her husband, because she was thinking and doing something for someone else. That is a big turning point for most people.
13. Your Attitude Creates Your Altitude. The better your attitude, the higher your level of well being and happiness will be. You are responsible for your attitude. Don't use other people, events or anything else as an excuse for having a poor attitude, don't blame others. A "poor me" attitude will keep you poor. A "why me" attitude will create more things for you to feel awful about. If your are having a "self pity" party, you will find that you are the only one there and it's not much fun.
14. Use These Power Tools. These 15 items are power tools from the power of being happy. If you don't use them, you will suffer and hurt yourself and become unhappy. These tools will work if you use them. Put them to work for yourself right now. You can now face any kind of problem that comes into your life. You may not like the problem, but with these power tools, you can work on any problem and turn it into something useful in your life.
15. Learn The Benefits Of Happiness. Live ten years longer, reduce anger, have less stress and confusion, have better focus, better patience and self control, access greater intelligence, utilize wisdom, experience emotional competence, create inner peace, enhanced relationships, and enjoy your life while enriching others with your happiness. Learn to use happiness to make a positive difference in your life and in the life of others.
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club. He can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The Web site is www.HappinessClub.com
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
As Oprah says, "Everything begins with a decision."
1. Make The Happiness Decision. If you don't decide to be happy now, you won't do it later. The decision is an intention to create what you want. The decision draws events and people toward you that create positive outcomes. The decision makes you aware of things in yourself and around you. The happiness decision is your responsibility, not someone else's. No one can make you happy. God can't make you happy. Only your decision to be happy will allow you to respond to happiness and well being.
2. Understand The Value Of Happiness. If you don't value happiness, you won't have it. Happiness has great value. You will only benefit from it if you take the time to understand the value of it. You deserve to be happy, don't undervalue yourself.
3. Happiness Is Within You. Don't look to the outside for your happiness. Happiness is an inside job. Don't let any situation be more important to you than your happiness. Situations are neutral, even if you think they are good or bad. The way you think about the situation is what makes you unhappy. The way you think sets up your reaction, not the situation itself.
4. Think About Your Choices. What choices do you have now? It is all a matter of what choices you have available to you. Thinking about your problems is not thinking, it is obsessive negatively. Stop dwelling on your problems and start focusing on your solutions. Thinking is when you are creatively finding solutions and choices to eliminate your problem.
5. Be Grateful. Be thankful about something all the time. What are you grateful for now? Every day, think of three things that you are grateful for and write them down in a Gratitude Journal. It does not matter if you come up with the same thing once in awhile, just list three things every day. This has been scientifically proven to produce long term happiness results. Want some gratitude hints? Make your list simple things. For instance, be grateful you can see the paper you are writing on and that you have eyes to see. Be grateful you can pick up a pen and you have fingers and a hand to write with. You're alive, you can breath, you have food, you have shelter, keep looking for the simple things.
6. Watch Your Thinking. Our unhappiness is a result of our thinking. Don't think about what you don't want or what you don't like. Control your negativity or your thinking is going to make you unhappy. Think about your choices or what you want. Be aware of your thoughts as they drift in and don't let negative ones find a place to land in your mind. Don't give them a home; let them drift right back out again.
7. Learn Acceptance. Deal with change. When you don't accept something that has already happened, you create resistance to it. The resistance you are creating will cause you to suffer. The change has already happened and if their is nothing you can do about it, and you continue to resist it, you will make yourself unhappy.
8. Now Is Your Point Of Power For Happiness. Don't dwell in the past or worry about the future. If you're not focused on now, your awareness will be diminished. Accidents, mishaps and even crime are more likely to happen to you.
9. Use Happiness As Your Strategy. Use the power of happiness in your life when things don't go the way you think they should. This is important especially when things are not going your way, or you are not getting what you want, or when you are feeling sad or down. It is important to use that power all the time. Use it especially when things are not going well for you. The power of happiness helps you detach from outside events so you don't internalize your reactive thoughts into negative compulsive obsessive thinking.
10. Act As If You're Happy. If you "act as if"... than you will be happy. Acting as if you are happy allows your brain to believe you are happy and tells your body to respond in like manner. This way, your body is not stressed out and your brain is producing all the right chemicals and drugs to keep you stress free. Act as if and your new state of being will create a happy atmosphere for your psychology and physiology.
11. Practice, Practice & More Practice. Practice being happy now. Being happy is an empowering state of mind. Happiness is a skill. Like all skills, the more you practice it the better you get. Make happiness a habit by practicing it all the time. Happiness is like a muscle, if you don't use it you'll lose it. Practice being friendly and being non-judgmental. Practice being forgiving, being kind, being complimentary, being a giving person, and practice letting go.
12. Do Something For Someone Else. Pay someone a compliment, smile, bring someone a plant. A woman I know has been dealing with the loss of her husband's death. I met her carrying a plant with a beautiful flower. She said that she was on her way to give it to someone. I knew right there and then that she was on her way to recovering. I recognized she was coping better with the loss of her husband, because she was thinking and doing something for someone else. That is a big turning point for most people.
13. Your Attitude Creates Your Altitude. The better your attitude, the higher your level of well being and happiness will be. You are responsible for your attitude. Don't use other people, events or anything else as an excuse for having a poor attitude, don't blame others. A "poor me" attitude will keep you poor. A "why me" attitude will create more things for you to feel awful about. If your are having a "self pity" party, you will find that you are the only one there and it's not much fun.
14. Use These Power Tools. These 15 items are power tools from the power of being happy. If you don't use them, you will suffer and hurt yourself and become unhappy. These tools will work if you use them. Put them to work for yourself right now. You can now face any kind of problem that comes into your life. You may not like the problem, but with these power tools, you can work on any problem and turn it into something useful in your life.
15. Learn The Benefits Of Happiness. Live ten years longer, reduce anger, have less stress and confusion, have better focus, better patience and self control, access greater intelligence, utilize wisdom, experience emotional competence, create inner peace, enhanced relationships, and enjoy your life while enriching others with your happiness. Learn to use happiness to make a positive difference in your life and in the life of others.
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club. He can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The Web site is www.HappinessClub.com
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Club Happiness E-Club
We have an extra-special Club Happiness for all our happ-e-friends all around the world! A wonderful friend of ours who lives in Australia by the name of Iolanda has created this wonderful new club. I know that you will really love this new e-club. It is called Club Happiness. We have created an online e-mail community for you to join and talk to people around the world. http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/clubhappiness/
"This is an e-club of people who are interested in happiness and everything about happiness. Being happy is great for our health but sometimes we're so caught up with our daily lives that we forget to try to be the happiest we can be. Sometimes we might need some help to get happy.
That's where Club Happiness can help. Join us as we share and discuss anything about a great topic - happiness :-) This is going to be a great online happiness community for people to enjoy between meetings, or for those that don't have any happiness groups where they live.
Club Happiness is run by our good friend David Ambrose. David lives in Calgary, Canada, after spending most of his life in South Africa. David knows a lot about happiness and is the author of the powerful book: Your Life Manual: Practical Steps To Genuine Happiness. David is even going to be teaching a happiness course at Mount Royal College in Canada, beginning May 2007. So you can imagine that I'm really happy to have him on board. We're very lucky indeed!
The messages posted from the list will come directly to your inbox - so when you join up be careful which e-mail address you give as you might end up getting quite a few e-mails from our busy list. To join up, just send an e-mail to this address clubhappiness-subscribe@yahoogroups.com and you should be notified of your membership almost right away.
As soon as you're a member you'll be able to post messages for everyone to read at this e-mail address clubhappiness@yahoogroups.com - so make sure your messages are readable and polite!! ;-) So what are you waiting for? Come sign up to the new Club Happiness! clubhappiness-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
"This is an e-club of people who are interested in happiness and everything about happiness. Being happy is great for our health but sometimes we're so caught up with our daily lives that we forget to try to be the happiest we can be. Sometimes we might need some help to get happy.
That's where Club Happiness can help. Join us as we share and discuss anything about a great topic - happiness :-) This is going to be a great online happiness community for people to enjoy between meetings, or for those that don't have any happiness groups where they live.
Club Happiness is run by our good friend David Ambrose. David lives in Calgary, Canada, after spending most of his life in South Africa. David knows a lot about happiness and is the author of the powerful book: Your Life Manual: Practical Steps To Genuine Happiness. David is even going to be teaching a happiness course at Mount Royal College in Canada, beginning May 2007. So you can imagine that I'm really happy to have him on board. We're very lucky indeed!
The messages posted from the list will come directly to your inbox - so when you join up be careful which e-mail address you give as you might end up getting quite a few e-mails from our busy list. To join up, just send an e-mail to this address clubhappiness-subscribe@yahoogroups.com and you should be notified of your membership almost right away.
As soon as you're a member you'll be able to post messages for everyone to read at this e-mail address clubhappiness@yahoogroups.com - so make sure your messages are readable and polite!! ;-) So what are you waiting for? Come sign up to the new Club Happiness! clubhappiness-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
VIRTUAL HAPPINESS CLUB
Join on the first Monday of every month at your home, on your phone, on the new VIRTUAL HAPPINESS CLUB!
You can listen and talk with a great happiness teacher each month.
Date: First Monday of each month.
Time: 7:00 - 8:00 PM, EST in the USA.
Phone number: (712) 775-7000
Your Access Code is: 122856#.
The Virtual Happiness Club is free, just your normal long distance charges apply. The first 90 callers may participate. The Virtual Happiness Club meets the first Monday of each month from 7:00 - 8:00. PM, EST in the USA.
Dr. Cynthia Barnett is an Adjunct Professor at The University of Bridgeport teaching courses on Happiness to teachers. Dr. Barnett is a certified Self-Esteem Facilitator, a graduate of Dr. Martin Seligman's Authentic Happiness Coaching, and Positive Psychology Master Class. Cynthia is an author, motivational speaker and life coach. Doctor Cynthia's web sites: www.refiredontretire.com & www.mydreamretirementguide.com phone: 203-855-9714 e-mail: DoctorCynthia@aol.com
You can listen and talk with a great happiness teacher each month.
Date: First Monday of each month.
Time: 7:00 - 8:00 PM, EST in the USA.
Phone number: (712) 775-7000
Your Access Code is: 122856#.
The Virtual Happiness Club is free, just your normal long distance charges apply. The first 90 callers may participate. The Virtual Happiness Club meets the first Monday of each month from 7:00 - 8:00. PM, EST in the USA.
Dr. Cynthia Barnett is an Adjunct Professor at The University of Bridgeport teaching courses on Happiness to teachers. Dr. Barnett is a certified Self-Esteem Facilitator, a graduate of Dr. Martin Seligman's Authentic Happiness Coaching, and Positive Psychology Master Class. Cynthia is an author, motivational speaker and life coach. Doctor Cynthia's web sites: www.refiredontretire.com & www.mydreamretirementguide.com phone: 203-855-9714 e-mail: DoctorCynthia@aol.com
Robert Muller, Living In Paradise On Earth
Robert Muller and Tom Van Sant
We Are Already Living In Paradise On Earth
Teleseminar
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
11:00 am Pacific - 2:00 pm Eastern
Sign Up Here http://www.eastbeach.org/teleseminars/rm070425.cfm
As I wrote Robert Muller's biography, I went looking for his most fundamental idea, the one central concept that best captured his unique vision of the world.
It's Paradise Earth! That's Robert Muller's golden fleece. In his view, we live in a paradise, and if we stop trying so hard to mess it up, we'll see that we really are in paradise and life is a miracle.
So what does Paradise Earth look like? More specifically, what does Robert Muller see when he talks about Paradise Earth, after spending 39 years as a peacemaker at the UN?
On April 25,! 2007 at 11:00 am Pacific, I'm going to ask Robert Muller and Tom Van Sant. Tom is an environmental planner, sculptor, painter, muralist, and architectural designer. He is best know as the creator of the GeoSphere Project, for which he was acknowledged by Al Gore twice in the Oscar-winning documentary "An Inconvenient Truth." The GeoSphere Image marks a milestone in cartographic history. It is the first satellite map of Earth showing the real world it appears from space.
Together they will answer YOUR questions about Paradise Earth. I can't wait to get them together: two of the world's leading holistic thinkers.
This teleseminar won't cost you anything but your regular long distance charges. To get the call-in details, just go to http://www.robertmullerpeacemaker.com
And tell Robert and Tom your most important question. Then I'll send you the phone number and passcode.
We could spend the rest of eternity worrying about all the problems in our world, but maybe we're missing the most important point. What if Robert is right and we're already living in a paradise? What if to see the big picture, we just have to recognize that it's already perfect?
Ask you question and sign up today by going to: http://www.robertmullerpeacemaker.com
Douglas Gillies
We Are Already Living In Paradise On Earth
Teleseminar
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
11:00 am Pacific - 2:00 pm Eastern
Sign Up Here http://www.eastbeach.org/teleseminars/rm070425.cfm
As I wrote Robert Muller's biography, I went looking for his most fundamental idea, the one central concept that best captured his unique vision of the world.
It's Paradise Earth! That's Robert Muller's golden fleece. In his view, we live in a paradise, and if we stop trying so hard to mess it up, we'll see that we really are in paradise and life is a miracle.
So what does Paradise Earth look like? More specifically, what does Robert Muller see when he talks about Paradise Earth, after spending 39 years as a peacemaker at the UN?
On April 25,! 2007 at 11:00 am Pacific, I'm going to ask Robert Muller and Tom Van Sant. Tom is an environmental planner, sculptor, painter, muralist, and architectural designer. He is best know as the creator of the GeoSphere Project, for which he was acknowledged by Al Gore twice in the Oscar-winning documentary "An Inconvenient Truth." The GeoSphere Image marks a milestone in cartographic history. It is the first satellite map of Earth showing the real world it appears from space.
Together they will answer YOUR questions about Paradise Earth. I can't wait to get them together: two of the world's leading holistic thinkers.
This teleseminar won't cost you anything but your regular long distance charges. To get the call-in details, just go to http://www.robertmullerpeacemaker.com
And tell Robert and Tom your most important question. Then I'll send you the phone number and passcode.
We could spend the rest of eternity worrying about all the problems in our world, but maybe we're missing the most important point. What if Robert is right and we're already living in a paradise? What if to see the big picture, we just have to recognize that it's already perfect?
Ask you question and sign up today by going to: http://www.robertmullerpeacemaker.com
Douglas Gillies
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Happiness Is A Chickadee!
April 4, 2007
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
A few winters ago I was putting sunflower seeds in the bird feeder for a big snowstorm we were expecting. I decided to try to hand feed some birds in my backyard. I put some crushed walnuts in my right hand and extended it. I stood absolutely motionless, and completely quiet on that cold winter day.
Within a few minutes, for the first time in my life, a bird landed on my hand. It was a Black Capped Chickadee, a cute tiny bird. It flew onto the tip of my fingers, picked up a piece of walnut and flew off to enjoy it. Soon it returned to land on my hand again. This time it picked up a piece of walnut and dropped it on the ground. Then it picked up another and dropped that on the ground as well. Finally it selected a third piece, which must have been just the right one, and flew off with it. It trusted me enough to take its time and make sure it had a nice delicious piece.
It was not long after this event, that I realized I had read a quote about the butterfly and happiness. Nathaniel Hawthorne said, "Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you." Now I can say, "Happiness is a Black Capped Chickadee, a cute tiny bird, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you."
For me, an interchange with nature is an unforgettable occasion in my life. It is nothing less than a spiritual experience. The experience with the Chickadee made me realize that happiness requires us to quiet down and allow things to come to us, not frantically chase after them. The more we pursue things that are beyond our grasp, the more they move away. The faster we pursue them, the faster they move away. Happiness requires us to relax, become quiet, and act as if we will get what we expect, without being upset when we don't.
Happiness, like the greatest things in life, requires patience, gentleness, and knowledge of what is possible. I had received a book called Hand-feeding Backyard Birds from my kids. I read it and knew what kinds of birds are most likely to be hand fed. I also knew which foods were their favorites. But when I first read the book, I thought that I'd never be able to do it. I believed that the odds were against me.
Being happy is a similar thing. You may not think you can do it, but if you learn enough about happiness, you can do it and you will do it when you realize it has been done by others. People did not believe it was possible to run a mile in less than four minutes. As soon as one person did it, that record was then broken over and over again. What one person can do, anyone can do.
How can I be happy? You can be happy by making happiness a decision, and by choosing happiness all the time. You can be happy by not allowing a situation, or a person to make you unhappy. Don't give up your happiness, because happiness is what we all want more than anything else.
Why is happiness so important? Happiness is an issue of power! When things make you unhappy, you lose your power. You give your power away to the things that make you unhappy. When you allow someone to make you unhappy, you are giving your power away to that person. So take your power back!
What if something bad happens? This is the time that you need happiness most of all to deal with hard times and stress. Happiness should be your strategy for dealing with negative things. When bad things happen, you need all the balance, wisdom and endurance you can find. Happiness allows you to gain access to your emotional intelligence. Happiness is your connection to yourself. It is in times of difficulty that you need to control your thinking, so you do not allow negative thinking to control you. Your reaction to the event is caused by the way you think about the event, not the event itself. You become unhappy as a result of your thinking, not as a result of what has happened.
How can I make happiness work for me? The decision to be happy allows you to find out when you are off track. As soon as you realize that you are unhappy, you are in control of changing your thoughts to allow you to choose happiness and get yourself back on the right track again. You can practice being happy even when you feel unhappy. When you pretend to be happy, you start to make yourself feel happy. When you act as if you are happy, you become happy. Once you are operating with happiness, you access your best thoughts, change your negative ones, and your whole state of mind is more peaceful. Your mind becomes flooded with choices, alternatives, and options. You begin to have ideas that will enable you to find the best solutions to the problems you are facing.
What if there is no solution to my problem? If there is no solution, then, you have no problem. You have something that you do not like and cannot change. In this case you are the problem. You will remain unhappy unless, and until you change your attitude toward what you think will not change. Remember the Serenity Prayer and let happiness show you the wisdom to know the difference between what you can and cannot change.
Do I have to live with what I don't like? If you can change it -- change it! If you can't change it, then learn to love it, or it will make you unhappy. Once you change your attitude about the thing you can't change and don't like, it usually changes all by itself. When you stop fighting with what you can't do anything about, the problem usually vanishes. What you resist -- will persist.
Is happiness always just beyond my grasp? Sit down quietly and keep your mind open to give happiness a place to join you. Smile...it becomes you!!!
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club. He can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The Web site is www.HappinessClub.com
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
A few winters ago I was putting sunflower seeds in the bird feeder for a big snowstorm we were expecting. I decided to try to hand feed some birds in my backyard. I put some crushed walnuts in my right hand and extended it. I stood absolutely motionless, and completely quiet on that cold winter day.
Within a few minutes, for the first time in my life, a bird landed on my hand. It was a Black Capped Chickadee, a cute tiny bird. It flew onto the tip of my fingers, picked up a piece of walnut and flew off to enjoy it. Soon it returned to land on my hand again. This time it picked up a piece of walnut and dropped it on the ground. Then it picked up another and dropped that on the ground as well. Finally it selected a third piece, which must have been just the right one, and flew off with it. It trusted me enough to take its time and make sure it had a nice delicious piece.
It was not long after this event, that I realized I had read a quote about the butterfly and happiness. Nathaniel Hawthorne said, "Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you." Now I can say, "Happiness is a Black Capped Chickadee, a cute tiny bird, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you."
For me, an interchange with nature is an unforgettable occasion in my life. It is nothing less than a spiritual experience. The experience with the Chickadee made me realize that happiness requires us to quiet down and allow things to come to us, not frantically chase after them. The more we pursue things that are beyond our grasp, the more they move away. The faster we pursue them, the faster they move away. Happiness requires us to relax, become quiet, and act as if we will get what we expect, without being upset when we don't.
Happiness, like the greatest things in life, requires patience, gentleness, and knowledge of what is possible. I had received a book called Hand-feeding Backyard Birds from my kids. I read it and knew what kinds of birds are most likely to be hand fed. I also knew which foods were their favorites. But when I first read the book, I thought that I'd never be able to do it. I believed that the odds were against me.
Being happy is a similar thing. You may not think you can do it, but if you learn enough about happiness, you can do it and you will do it when you realize it has been done by others. People did not believe it was possible to run a mile in less than four minutes. As soon as one person did it, that record was then broken over and over again. What one person can do, anyone can do.
How can I be happy? You can be happy by making happiness a decision, and by choosing happiness all the time. You can be happy by not allowing a situation, or a person to make you unhappy. Don't give up your happiness, because happiness is what we all want more than anything else.
Why is happiness so important? Happiness is an issue of power! When things make you unhappy, you lose your power. You give your power away to the things that make you unhappy. When you allow someone to make you unhappy, you are giving your power away to that person. So take your power back!
What if something bad happens? This is the time that you need happiness most of all to deal with hard times and stress. Happiness should be your strategy for dealing with negative things. When bad things happen, you need all the balance, wisdom and endurance you can find. Happiness allows you to gain access to your emotional intelligence. Happiness is your connection to yourself. It is in times of difficulty that you need to control your thinking, so you do not allow negative thinking to control you. Your reaction to the event is caused by the way you think about the event, not the event itself. You become unhappy as a result of your thinking, not as a result of what has happened.
How can I make happiness work for me? The decision to be happy allows you to find out when you are off track. As soon as you realize that you are unhappy, you are in control of changing your thoughts to allow you to choose happiness and get yourself back on the right track again. You can practice being happy even when you feel unhappy. When you pretend to be happy, you start to make yourself feel happy. When you act as if you are happy, you become happy. Once you are operating with happiness, you access your best thoughts, change your negative ones, and your whole state of mind is more peaceful. Your mind becomes flooded with choices, alternatives, and options. You begin to have ideas that will enable you to find the best solutions to the problems you are facing.
What if there is no solution to my problem? If there is no solution, then, you have no problem. You have something that you do not like and cannot change. In this case you are the problem. You will remain unhappy unless, and until you change your attitude toward what you think will not change. Remember the Serenity Prayer and let happiness show you the wisdom to know the difference between what you can and cannot change.
Do I have to live with what I don't like? If you can change it -- change it! If you can't change it, then learn to love it, or it will make you unhappy. Once you change your attitude about the thing you can't change and don't like, it usually changes all by itself. When you stop fighting with what you can't do anything about, the problem usually vanishes. What you resist -- will persist.
Is happiness always just beyond my grasp? Sit down quietly and keep your mind open to give happiness a place to join you. Smile...it becomes you!!!
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club. He can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The Web site is www.HappinessClub.com
A MANUAL FOR LIVING
March 21, 2007
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
I would like to introduce you to an old friend of mine. You might call him the great grandfather of happiness. His name is Epictetus, a Greek Stoic philosopher who lived from 55 - 135 AD spending most of his life in Rome. Epictetus was a slave that became crippled but eventually gained his freedom. Epictetus credits Socrates for his thinking. He showed us the way to happiness, fulfillment, and tranquility by spending his life on that path. Epictetus main work was called The Discourses. His most profound truth was: "We are disturbed not by events, but by the views which we take of them."
The title of this article is from the book: A Manual For Living by Sharon Lebell. Sharon's book is a new interpretation of Epictetus work. Sharon has done an excellent job of expressing these age-old concepts.
Let me share some of these thoughts with you. "Know what you can control and what you can't. Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: some things are within our control, and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can't control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness becomes possible."
Notice the simple yet profound truths that are contained in these quotes by Epictetus. "We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them." And this: "Authentic happiness is always independent of external conditions. Vigilantly practice indifference to external conditions. Your happiness can only be found within." Now there is a profound truth for you and it was spoken 2,000 years ago and it is still true today. Human nature has not changed much in all these years.
Here are some more quotes to think about: "Events themselves are impersonal and indifferent. When considering the future, remember that all situations unfold as they do regardless of how we feel about them. Our hopes and fears sway us, not events themselves." Consider this one: "Be discriminating about what images and ideas you permit into your mind. If you don't choose what thoughts and images you expose yourself to, someone else will, and their motives may not be the highest."
I will leave you with one more great thought of our friend Epictetus. At this point, I feel that you have made a friend of him as well. He said: "Most people tend to delude themselves into thinking that freedom comes from doing what feels good or what fosters comfort and ease. The truth is that people who subordinate reason to their feelings or the moment are actually slaves of their desires and aversions."
Our old friend Epictetus was a slave, a cripple, a teacher and a philosopher. One of his students was Marcus Aurlius Antoninus who became the Emperor of Rome. Marcus Aurlius was also famous for writing the wonderful book called: Meditations. So, that is the story of the slave who became a teacher to the ruler of the Roman Empire. I encourage you to read Epictetus' words because you will learn to rule your own empire with a great deal of wisdom and happiness. Epictetus' objective was for you to become master of your own life. I absolutely agree with him!
Epictetus has made his way into today's modern psychology because psychologist Albert Ellis, Ph.D. the founder of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, credits Epictetus with providing a foundation for his system of psychotherapy. His book How to Make Yourself Happy and Remarkably Less Disturbable is on my top 20 happiness books. Dr. Albert Ellis has written over 90 other books. Dr. Ellis shows you how to overcome destructive beliefs, feelings and behaviors using Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy. Dr. Ellis is 95 years young and is still practicing psychology today.
Our next Happiness Club meeting is March 22, from 7:00-9:00 P.M. The presentation is "Understanding Happiness," with Dr. Leonard J. Waks. Dr. Waks and I will be discussing happiness and it's relationship to philosophy and psychology and how that relates to you. Leonard J. Waks has doctorates in both philosophy and psychology, and taught full time at Purdue, Stanford, Penn State and Temple universities from 1966 until his retirement in 2005. Dr. Waks maintains an active schedule of speaking and writing.
We also have another presentation called: "I Need A Face-Lift, Spiritually Speaking, by Kathleen J. Dolan. Kathleen is the author of the above named book. Kathleen will vitalize you with her thirty-one day, Magnify Your Inner Beauty, step-by-step Guide. Learn to have the peace of mind you need and experience happiness all year.
The meeting will be held in the Rotary Room, at the Fairfield Public Library, located at 1080 Old Post Road. There is no charge for the meeting and everyone's welcome! Change your thoughts and you change your life!
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
I would like to introduce you to an old friend of mine. You might call him the great grandfather of happiness. His name is Epictetus, a Greek Stoic philosopher who lived from 55 - 135 AD spending most of his life in Rome. Epictetus was a slave that became crippled but eventually gained his freedom. Epictetus credits Socrates for his thinking. He showed us the way to happiness, fulfillment, and tranquility by spending his life on that path. Epictetus main work was called The Discourses. His most profound truth was: "We are disturbed not by events, but by the views which we take of them."
The title of this article is from the book: A Manual For Living by Sharon Lebell. Sharon's book is a new interpretation of Epictetus work. Sharon has done an excellent job of expressing these age-old concepts.
Let me share some of these thoughts with you. "Know what you can control and what you can't. Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: some things are within our control, and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental rule and learned to distinguish between what you can and can't control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness becomes possible."
Notice the simple yet profound truths that are contained in these quotes by Epictetus. "We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them." And this: "Authentic happiness is always independent of external conditions. Vigilantly practice indifference to external conditions. Your happiness can only be found within." Now there is a profound truth for you and it was spoken 2,000 years ago and it is still true today. Human nature has not changed much in all these years.
Here are some more quotes to think about: "Events themselves are impersonal and indifferent. When considering the future, remember that all situations unfold as they do regardless of how we feel about them. Our hopes and fears sway us, not events themselves." Consider this one: "Be discriminating about what images and ideas you permit into your mind. If you don't choose what thoughts and images you expose yourself to, someone else will, and their motives may not be the highest."
I will leave you with one more great thought of our friend Epictetus. At this point, I feel that you have made a friend of him as well. He said: "Most people tend to delude themselves into thinking that freedom comes from doing what feels good or what fosters comfort and ease. The truth is that people who subordinate reason to their feelings or the moment are actually slaves of their desires and aversions."
Our old friend Epictetus was a slave, a cripple, a teacher and a philosopher. One of his students was Marcus Aurlius Antoninus who became the Emperor of Rome. Marcus Aurlius was also famous for writing the wonderful book called: Meditations. So, that is the story of the slave who became a teacher to the ruler of the Roman Empire. I encourage you to read Epictetus' words because you will learn to rule your own empire with a great deal of wisdom and happiness. Epictetus' objective was for you to become master of your own life. I absolutely agree with him!
Epictetus has made his way into today's modern psychology because psychologist Albert Ellis, Ph.D. the founder of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy, credits Epictetus with providing a foundation for his system of psychotherapy. His book How to Make Yourself Happy and Remarkably Less Disturbable is on my top 20 happiness books. Dr. Albert Ellis has written over 90 other books. Dr. Ellis shows you how to overcome destructive beliefs, feelings and behaviors using Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy. Dr. Ellis is 95 years young and is still practicing psychology today.
Our next Happiness Club meeting is March 22, from 7:00-9:00 P.M. The presentation is "Understanding Happiness," with Dr. Leonard J. Waks. Dr. Waks and I will be discussing happiness and it's relationship to philosophy and psychology and how that relates to you. Leonard J. Waks has doctorates in both philosophy and psychology, and taught full time at Purdue, Stanford, Penn State and Temple universities from 1966 until his retirement in 2005. Dr. Waks maintains an active schedule of speaking and writing.
We also have another presentation called: "I Need A Face-Lift, Spiritually Speaking, by Kathleen J. Dolan. Kathleen is the author of the above named book. Kathleen will vitalize you with her thirty-one day, Magnify Your Inner Beauty, step-by-step Guide. Learn to have the peace of mind you need and experience happiness all year.
The meeting will be held in the Rotary Room, at the Fairfield Public Library, located at 1080 Old Post Road. There is no charge for the meeting and everyone's welcome! Change your thoughts and you change your life!
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
THE SECRET
Published in Fairfield Citizen-News on March 7, 2007
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
There has been quite a bit of talk about the book, The Secret. The book is also available as an audio book on CD and a movie on DVD. Some of the people who wrote parts for The Secret have been seen on Larry King and Oprah. The Secret is a book by Rhonda Byrne. The Secret is all about making one point and that is the Law of Attraction and features many people providing their comments and stories.
What is the law of attraction? I define the law of attraction as being aligned within yourself to draw the very best towards you. Some may call it the law of manifestation. I think that simple faith, which the bible talks about, is exactly what the law of attraction is. What you think about, without getting in the way of, is what you can bring into being. You get to see what you want because you are drawing it toward you, without blocking it with negative thoughts and actions.
The book talks about seeing parking spaces close to the entrance of shopping malls and stores with crowded parking. I have been visualizing great parking spaces for so long they had to create handicapped parking so I would not get the very first space next to the entrance. Now I get the space next to the handicapped space. I am much happier getting this space because I like to see people who need that first space get it or at least have it be available to them.
Every time you say, "what a crowded parking area, I will never find a space here," you prevent yourself from even having a chance of finding a good space. O' you of little faith! Come on, let's lighten up and start thinking a little more positively. Instead of saying to yourself, "I'll believe it when I see it, start telling yourself, "I'll see it when I believe it."
Over the years, the secret has been know by other names as well. For example, the word visualization was used to show how to draw what you wanted toward yourself. A great book on this was called: Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain.
You have probably heard of affirmations as well. Affirmations are a great way to achieve what you want. The best way to do this is to write your thoughts down on paper. You would be surprised how well this works, once you write it down. The process of repeating an affirmation may seem slow at first, but there is a great deal of power in your affirmations, if you do them correctly and consistently.
The main thing to do, whether it is using the law of attraction, of manifestation, of visualization, of affirmation or just plain faith, is to act as though you have received it already. Don't say, "I want to be healthy, I want to be wealthy, I want to be happy." That's not a present moment intention. Instead, you can start saying, I am healthy, I am wealthy, I am happy. The secret is to think and act like you have already received your desire now in this present moment. If you are not experiencing it now, then you are working against yourself, and you are decreasing your odds of having what you want.
I want to make this last and most important point to you. Attracting what you want is a great thing, believe me. Once you have perfected the law of attraction you can use it as a power of giving it out to others. If someone wants something, you can send it to him or her. Happiness is very much this kind of power. Once you have used the law of attraction and are being happy you can give it to others. It seems that this point was not made in the book, The Secret.
It has been said that it is better to give than to receive. Actually, giving and receiving are both important. Maybe you can open both channels for yourself. While you are attracting things you want and need, you can just as easily start giving to others. Seeing others receiving something they need is a joy in itself.
I just got back from the mall because I needed some vitamins. I parked in the space next to the handicapped parking space, which was right next to the entrance. When I came out of the mall, a car with a handicapped tag parked next to me in the handicapped space. Life is perfect and everyone can be happy. What are you attracting into your life?
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian
There has been quite a bit of talk about the book, The Secret. The book is also available as an audio book on CD and a movie on DVD. Some of the people who wrote parts for The Secret have been seen on Larry King and Oprah. The Secret is a book by Rhonda Byrne. The Secret is all about making one point and that is the Law of Attraction and features many people providing their comments and stories.
What is the law of attraction? I define the law of attraction as being aligned within yourself to draw the very best towards you. Some may call it the law of manifestation. I think that simple faith, which the bible talks about, is exactly what the law of attraction is. What you think about, without getting in the way of, is what you can bring into being. You get to see what you want because you are drawing it toward you, without blocking it with negative thoughts and actions.
The book talks about seeing parking spaces close to the entrance of shopping malls and stores with crowded parking. I have been visualizing great parking spaces for so long they had to create handicapped parking so I would not get the very first space next to the entrance. Now I get the space next to the handicapped space. I am much happier getting this space because I like to see people who need that first space get it or at least have it be available to them.
Every time you say, "what a crowded parking area, I will never find a space here," you prevent yourself from even having a chance of finding a good space. O' you of little faith! Come on, let's lighten up and start thinking a little more positively. Instead of saying to yourself, "I'll believe it when I see it, start telling yourself, "I'll see it when I believe it."
Over the years, the secret has been know by other names as well. For example, the word visualization was used to show how to draw what you wanted toward yourself. A great book on this was called: Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain.
You have probably heard of affirmations as well. Affirmations are a great way to achieve what you want. The best way to do this is to write your thoughts down on paper. You would be surprised how well this works, once you write it down. The process of repeating an affirmation may seem slow at first, but there is a great deal of power in your affirmations, if you do them correctly and consistently.
The main thing to do, whether it is using the law of attraction, of manifestation, of visualization, of affirmation or just plain faith, is to act as though you have received it already. Don't say, "I want to be healthy, I want to be wealthy, I want to be happy." That's not a present moment intention. Instead, you can start saying, I am healthy, I am wealthy, I am happy. The secret is to think and act like you have already received your desire now in this present moment. If you are not experiencing it now, then you are working against yourself, and you are decreasing your odds of having what you want.
I want to make this last and most important point to you. Attracting what you want is a great thing, believe me. Once you have perfected the law of attraction you can use it as a power of giving it out to others. If someone wants something, you can send it to him or her. Happiness is very much this kind of power. Once you have used the law of attraction and are being happy you can give it to others. It seems that this point was not made in the book, The Secret.
It has been said that it is better to give than to receive. Actually, giving and receiving are both important. Maybe you can open both channels for yourself. While you are attracting things you want and need, you can just as easily start giving to others. Seeing others receiving something they need is a joy in itself.
I just got back from the mall because I needed some vitamins. I parked in the space next to the handicapped parking space, which was right next to the entrance. When I came out of the mall, a car with a handicapped tag parked next to me in the handicapped space. Life is perfect and everyone can be happy. What are you attracting into your life?
Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
