LOCATION! LOCATION! LOCATION!

By Lionel Ketchian

The three most important things about real estate are LOCATION! LOCATION! LOCATION! It's just as true when it applies to your HAPPINESS.

Like most people, you're probably looking for happiness. Our country is founded on the principle of the "pursuit of happiness." We have grown up being told, and believed, that happiness is out there...somewhere. Happiness cannot be found "out there," because it's within you! Happiness is a matter of LOCATION! LOCATION! LOCATION! If you cannot find happiness where you are right now, where are you going to find it?

The pursuit of happiness is wonderful way of finding happiness. You must pursue happiness is the right way. Often it leads you to the very opposite, which is unhappiness. As long as you think someone else will make you happy, you have taken the power away from yourself to make it happen.

If you are waiting for the right things to happen, so you can finally be happy, then you are losing valuable days of your life. You are waiting to finish school, so you can get on with your life, and get a good job so you can pay for your education and make a living. You're waiting to find someone nice, so you can have a loving partner and get married, and have kids. Then. you wait for the kids to grow up, catch up on the bills for the kids, and the house, so you can be happy. You hope the kids finally leave the house so you can be happy. You try to make enough money for retirement so you can finally be happy. Happiness has somehow eluded you.

Happiness will not be your mate, your marriage, your kids, your house or your money! Happiness is not found outside of yourself. Happiness can only be accomplished from the inside out. When you need reasons to be happy, you end up with reasons to be unhappy. Why does that happen each and every time? Life will never be perfect enough for you to be happy. You must first be happy, for everything else to finally be perfect enough.

Once again, happiness is a matter of location. As long as you put your power outside yourself, you allow someone, or some thing else to have power over you. You will not be happy. The same is true of allowing yourself to be happy when the situation gets better. Great! Now you're happy because things are finally going the way you want. However, just as soon as the situation becomes worse, you become unhappy again. You must ask yourself is if you were ever happy to begin with.

Many times you end up getting the situation you desire in life, and yet you are still unhappy. Worrying about losing something prevents you from being happy. It's strange, because you get what you want, than worry about losing it. This is the way millions of people live their lives. They just don't know where happiness is located.

Why give people, events, situations and even serious illness power over you? Change what you can, and don't give the things you can't change power over you. Happiness is an issue of power. When you give your power away to any of life's situations, you lose your happiness. It is so important to not give up your power, which is your happiness. Think about it, if something makes you unhappy, it has power over you, right? If a person makes you unhappy, it's an issue of power. They seem to have the power to make you unhappy, the truth is, you have given them your power. Remember to take it back, it belongs to you!

We think we have to get loud and angry or get mad, get sad, or get even, to change things. In other words, we think we have to become unhappy to get what we want. It is a current belief that acting unhappy is a powerful way to change things that you don't like. Actually the opposite is true. When you stay happy, you are exercising your power. Staying happy allows you access to your wisdom. Stay with your happiness, it's what you want. Think about a time when you were unhappy. Take a good look at how you felt when you were unhappy. Is it worth feeling like that for anything? No, of course not! Staying happy will get you what you want much quicker, and better than unhappiness ever will.

In the book, As a Man Thinketh, by James Allen, he says, "Let a man radically alter his thoughts, and he will be astonished at the rapid transformation it will effect in the material conditions of his life." Remember that what has happened is not as important as what you do about what has happened.

The next time someone asks, "Where do you find happiness?" Tell them it is all about location, location, location. Tell them they are standing on the very spot for finding happiness...it is right there within themselves.

THE HEART OF HAPPINESS!

By Lionel Ketchian

We recently celebrated Valentine's Day, so let's talk about matters of the heart. On Valentine's Day you think of love. But let me ask you this question; what is love? Of course it is about your feelings for another person. Where does love come from? I'll tell you where! Love comes from your happiness. Think about it for a minute. We talk about finding the love of our lives and living happily ever after. Do you know anyone that wants to get married so they can live unhappily ever after? I don't think so. Although many people fall in love to become happy, many eventually become unhappy nevertheless.

A happy heart is a loving heart! Happiness is where love comes from. When you are happy love is there. When you first fall in love, the other person seems so perfect. You don't see any faults, you see only beauty and you're in touch with only wonderful feelings for them. It may take days, months, or years, but you begin to wonder what happened to this person you fell in love with. Why have they changed so much? Did you really know them in the first place? What happened to them? Maybe it's you? Maybe you changed your expectations of them. Maybe, you fell out of happiness!

You cannot feel love toward another unless you are happy. Happiness is the foundation for love. Much of the time people want to be loved. They want to be loved because they do not love themselves. The reason for that is they are just not happy. If you can begin living your life with happiness, love would find you so fast, you would not believe what happened. The way it seems to happen is we are unhappy, so we need someone in our life to fill the void.

We go out and look for someone to love, desperately. Even if someone would, or could love us in that state we would still soon be unhappy. This is because we are unhappy and we are looking for someone to make us happy. Even if the other person you loved were happy it would not be enough to make you both happy.

We need to learn the art of Being Happy. Once we are happy we will go out and attract, or be attracted to someone who is sincerely happy. Instead of being unhappy and finding someone to fill the void, being happy allows us to find someone to share our joy. WOW! What a winning combination that would be. Two people who are happy could really find and share love, and it would be the real thing. Love can only grow in a happy environment, which is part of your very soul.

What is happiness? It is unconditional acceptance of life, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Once we can understand unconditional happiness we can love, and be loved. Part of what I am talking about is accepting yourself for all your parts, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Once you do that you realize you are good enough. In fact you're perfect! When you feel good about yourself it is then that you can improve yourself. In fact Being Happy is the best self-improvement exercise that I know of.

How many times have you heard that you need to learn to love yourself? People ask me if it is self-centered to love yourself. The answer is no! When you love yourself you are gentle on yourself, and you can more easily be that way with others. It's when you are self-centered, rather than self-loving that the problems start.

Self-centered people want to talk about themselves all the time. They don't really care about others. This is what a self centered person might say: "Oh, here I am talking about nothing but myself, I have been talking about myself for twenty minutes, enough of that. OK, it's your turn to talk about me." This is a joke of course, but there is a lot of truth to it.

Self-centered people want everyone else to tell him or her how great they are. They want other people to love them, but they can't love back. Why? The reason is; they are just not happy. A person who is self-centered is not Being Happy and must constantly look for happiness. Self-centered people have no love for themselves so they have none to give others.

A self-loving person is happy and wants to share their happiness and love with other people. Self-loving people love themselves, so they are in touch with love within themselves. That is where they get the love they have to give others. When you love yourself, you are connected to yourself. You know yourself, and you have healthy self-esteem. You love others as much as you love yourself.

It is so important to be happy. We must learn to detach our sense of worth from outside things and place it within ourselves for a real sense of worth. After all, how can you give love unless you have love to give? How can you give happiness, unless you have happiness? When you have happiness within you, you can reach within and give love to another.

If you want to live happily ever after, then be happy now. This is the way to real love. People stop loving because they decide things that have happened are more important than their happiness. If you want to love forever than don't give up your happiness. Allow Being Happy to show you the way to deal with obstacles and the problems that get in your way in life.

Remember no one is perfect. We are all doing the very best we can. Though it does not look like people are doing their best...they are. It may not be the best you can do, but given their life experience, fears, hopes, and thinking, it is the best they can do at the time. Let's not be too hasty to judge others, especially the ones we love.

Love flourishes in happiness, love multiplies and overflows in a rich and happy heart! Have a heart - Be Happy, and you will be more loving. Happy Valentine's Day! I Love You with a happy heart.

Lighten Up! Be Happy!

By Lionel Ketchian

How are those New Year's resolutions you made going for you? You may have made it through the first week and now you realize you're not keeping them. Don't be hard on yourself; Lighten Up! Be Happy! You say you would like to be happy, but you have problems. Guess what, everyone has problems. Stop letting your problems affect you.

Are you worrying about your problems? Most people allow worry to get the best of them. Worrying is not going to solve your problems. In fact, worrying is just another problem for you to deal with. Thinking about your problem is not worrying. That's because thinking is directed toward solving the problem. Think about the solutions you have available to you. When you come up with solutions, you will not need to worry about your problems.

According to one survey of white-collar workers, most of them have or would have made reducing stress their number one resolution, they felt that it was even more important to them than losing those extra pounds or to stop smoking.

Lighten Up! Be Happy and you will reduce stress in you life as well as find solutions to your problems faster. You will even find better solutions because you will be in a better frame of mind. Lighten Up! Change your attitude. Your attitude is a part of your problem. Attitude has a dramatic effect on your problems and your life. How does lightening up and being happy have a positive affect on you life? I'll tell you the secret if you promise to tell everyone. It is all about POWER. Energy is power that you have control over. Energy is Power and Happiness is Power. Happiness is energy of the highest order. Happiness is your power source, get connected! As a source of power it can produce energy. Energy is all around us, so it's not about finding energy and using the energy, it's about tapping into your power supply.

Your connection is happiness. To prove it to you look at the opposite, which is unhappiness. Unhappiness is a feeling of being disconnected. Unhappiness is about being cut off from the energy that we feel when we are happy. Look at how we describe both states of being. We describe unhappiness as being down and out or feeling low. We describe happiness as feeling high or being in the flow. Happiness is our connection to power. Happiness is our connection to one another. When we experience happiness with another human being we feel connected. Laughter produces the same results, and as an aspect of happiness, it makes us feel better. It's an energy producer, and it is a source of power because it brings people together.

Remember the old saying, "Laughter is the best medicine?" A medicine changes a weakened state into a healthy, more powerful state. To be able to lighten up and laugh may be one of the most powerful things you can do, especially when things are not going well. When a family member, a friend or you are not feeling well, or maybe are fighting a serious illness, how can lightening up and being happy change such a serious situation? Lightening up can be the most powerful thing you can do in a serious situation. The reason is that you are taking control of yourself. That is real power! To laugh often and much, especially at your self, can create the energy you need to help you have the power and energy to overcome the illness.

Whether you have medical, financial or relationships problems, Lighten Up and Be Happy and notice the positive benefits. What are they? Being happy when everything looks bad makes you take charge of the situation and yourself. You are not allowing the situation to tell you what to do. Once you become unhappy, you are letting the problem tell you what to think and how to act. When you can be happy in the worst situation you, become the most powerful person in the world. You become who you really are. Problems do not make you; they reveal who you really are.

Everyone wants to be happy. To really be happy, you must learn happiness is a cause, not an effect. Almost everyone lives his or her life with happiness as an effect. People want happiness, and hope it comes to them in their day to day lives. People wake up in the morning hoping it will be there in a compliment or in something that happens to them during the day. The problem with happiness as effect is no matter how many"good things" happen, you will let the smallest "bad thing" takes it all away. This is the real reason most people do not find happiness "out there."

There is another way to live your life. Live your life with "Happiness as a Cause." OK but how do you do that? Decide to be happy -- no matter what. You wake up in the morning and decide to be happy. You go through the day and experience people and events that would make most people unhappy, Not You! You're too smart for that. You know that you, and only you, are in charge of your happiness, no one else is. You wouldn't want anyone else to be in charge of your happiness.

The secret to living your life is to: "Lighten Up! Be Happy!" This is your power source for energy, rarely experienced by most people. Yes, it does take discipline to stick to the resolution to be happy. It is worth it, believe me. Nothing makes more sense than Being Happy. It will carry you from the valleys of despair to the mountaintop of joy.

You have a right to be unhappy. I cannot talk you out of it. Most people have allowed unhappiness to be the strategy to living their life. Does it feel right to you? Of course not! There is another way. Lighten Up! Be Happy and you will be the cause of what you experience. No one can change your attitude without your permission. Sometimes things will go your way and sometimes they won't. You may not always get to choose what happens, but you always get to decide how you will think about what happens.

Lighten Up! Be Happy. Become the most powerful person you have ever known. Another important key is that you must want happiness even more than you want to get rid of your problem. Happiness will give you the energy to overcome your problem, if it is at all possible. Control your power and you control your problem. Happiness is the power you have, choose it and use it well. The real secret to happiness is don't wait for it to happen, make it part of your life.

DO GOOD THIS YEAR, STARTING WITH YOURSELF

By Lionel Ketchian

If you would like to find a way out of your unhappiness then let's begin by understanding that happiness has value and that is what you want for yourself in all cases. You could make the happiness decision for yourself. Once you do that you could be making better choices regarding the way you are acting and doing things in their life.

Once someone makes the happiness decision, they begin to do good things for themselves. If you don't start with doing what is good for you, you will not be able to do good for others. Most unhappy people want to do good for others. They think it is the right thing to do by doing good. You are not a good enough person until you are happy, because then you will be happy and do good happily.

It is great to "do good" for others. It is wonderful to "do the right thing," for others. Forget about others for now. You are not good enough until you are happy. Then you will be good and happy as well. You must attend to yourself first. If you don't have yourself in order, which is using happiness to your advantage, then your life will not be in order as a result of your not taking care of the one thing that counts in your life, you and they way you use your thinking.

You must ask yourself, what if I don't give a gift, or make a call, what is the worst that can happen. Why do I have to drink wine, so I can fit into the crowd and feel like I am making others happy? Find happiness for yourself first and then you can gift it to others.

This means you will begin to examine every single thing you do. You begin to do nothing without making a choice about doing it. You might start by acting like you are happy and then watch what you do or don't do. It does not matter what you do or don't do; it matters what you are being. Once you are being happy, everything you do will be the right thing for you. Believe it or not, it will also be good for others as well. If others don't want you to be happy that means there is something wrong with them.

Once you are being happy you begin to realize that you can recognize when things make you unhappy. Go back to being happy and in that higher state, you can more clearly see what your choices are regarding the problem or situation you are faced with. You may not have a choice about what you want to do and what you must do. But you always have a choice to do it with happiness no matter what.

You don't have to believe this, you only need to apply it in your life. You will feel the power of happiness working for you until you extinguish it with your own negative thoughts.

Yes, it is never the situation that makes you unhappy. It is your own thoughts and negative reactions that make you unhappy. It does not matter as much what happens, it is your reaction that matters most. Do you know why this is? The reason is that when something bad happens, it happened and it is over and done with. It may not even exist. It is your thoughts about the thing that happened that you are still living with, not the actual thing.

It is like saying that it is cold outside, it is 25 degrees out today. So you go outside and take all your clothes off because you don't like the fact that it is cold out. That sounds crazy, right? It is exactly what we do when we don't like a situation; we do what is bad for us. Our unhappiness is what we have to live with, not the problem. And our unhappiness will not be a solution to our situation. Our happiness will find the very best choice that we can use as a solution to the problem. This immediately makes us feel better, or at least does not make us feel unhappy.

If you are unhappy you are allowing the world and everything in it to tell you what to do, feel and think. If you like being controlled by everything than continue using unhappiness as your strategy for living. If you are unhappy, then that is proof positive that you have given your power away to people or to circumstances and situations. It is not your fault that you have been doing that because, until now, you did not know a better way. Now that you know you have a choice, it is your responsibility to use happiness to your benefit. Now you know better than putting your hand on a hot stove.

Do I think you should be happy? No, I don't care what you do. My job is done; I am showing you that your happiness is your decision and that you can choose it in any situation. It is your business what you do with the information and with this strategy. You can choose to learn more about how to use happiness in your life. You can read about it, go on the web, go to meetings regarding it. There are unlimited things you can choose to do to lift yourself up in life, but you can only do what's best for you when you are in a calm, happy mental state of mind.

If you have been making the unhappiness decision, you can now make the happiness decision. Once you make this happiness decision you can choose happiness in every situation. Only when you are aware that you can make the choice to be happy is the choice available to you. You can't make the choice that you are not aware of. The next time you are unhappy and blame it on something else, remember that you forgot that you had the choice to be happy. It is not possible to be happy with a victim mentality. A happy person has that choice and an unhappy person does not know they have that choice.

It is your life and you don't get to choose what happens, you can always choose your response. The way you have been, is a function of what you have already decided is true for you, and your life. Instead of using your past to decide what your future will be, you can always make the happiness decision now.

The only question to ask yourself is; Am I going to choose something good or bad for myself. Am I going to choose to be my own worst enemy, or my own best friend? Your decisions not only dictate your life; they are your life. Choose well my friend.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

By Lionel Ketchian

I'd like to ask you a question. Are you happy? Right now is always a great time to begin Being Happy! What are you waiting for? Maybe it is more money, or a house. Maybe it's a bigger house or a better house? You may be waiting to have kids or you are waiting for the kids to leave. How about a better girlfriend, or boyfriend or a new improved husband or wife? Are you waiting for things like this to make you happy?

If you were waiting for reasons to make you happy, a hundred years more would not be enough. Choose happiness first and the reasons will flow into your life. In fact, why not choose unconditional happiness? If you place conditions on your happiness, you will be conditioned by events and people you have no control over. You will allow the outside world to have control over you. By not choosing happiness, you are allowing situations and people to control your life.

You're unhappy because you are not in control of your happiness. Why give control of something as important as your happiness to other people? That job is best left up to you. Make the Happiness Decision. Make being happy your New Year's Resolution. In fact, learn that you can be happy no matter what.

One of the greatest lessons I have learned was from a wonderful man by the name of Epictetus; he was born 2,009 years ago as a slave in the Roman Empire. He was granted freedom at age 30, so he lived half his life as a slave and the rest of his life till he was 60 years old as a free man. The lesson he taught me was the following: "It is our opinions of things and not the things themselves that cause the disturbances of our lives."

Life may not be fair, but if we allow the things we cannot control, to control us, than we are the ones who are not being fair. The part that we need to learn is that we must be fair to ourselves. Instead of letting events tell us what to do and how to feel, we must look for new ways to deal with the upsets of life. We need to be there for ourselves. No matter how bad things may get, being unhappy does not do us any good. Being unhappy actually makes things much worse then they already are.

We must be fair to ourselves. A good way to do this is to make the Happiness Decision and choose happiness, no matter what. In this way, we can deal with what is happening and make the very best of it. No one is smart enough to be negative, because no one knows what will happen next. It doesn't make sense to be a negative person. Life can be unfair, knowing that, whose side are you on? Do you expect to have anyone else on your side if you're not! Choose happiness and you will be supporting your best side, as well as doing your best for other people. Being happy attracts people to you like a magnet. That's why positive people attract more people to themselves.

It has been said that circumstances do not make a man, they reveal him. Life may be unfair, but the only choice we have in the final examination, is what will we do next. Emotions can become our worst enemy when we lose control of ourselves. Happiness is one thing that does make sense. It is the way of wisdom, when we need to know which way to go from here. The Happiness Decision allows us to deal with the situations and the circumstances we face in life, in more intelligent ways.

True happiness gives birth to love. Love comes from happiness. People stop loving each other because they allow themselves to become unhappy, and negative. True happiness is peace. You cannot be peaceful and unhappy. The two states cannot exist in the same dwelling. True happiness is the way of peace. This time of the year we wish each other peace, and also wish each other Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year. Only when each of us becomes happy; can true peace emerge.

The Happiness Decision and being happy gives us the best strategy for dealing with life. Being Happy allows peace to be encountered by other people. Peace is not something to acquire like a material possession. Peace is not something to get. You cannot have peace, you can't own it, you can only use it. Peace is here for you now, don't let it go, be smart and make good use of it by being happy.

If you really want peace, Being Happy is your best choice. Happiness begins within you. To give it to others, you must have it, and to have it and you must be it. You cannot give away what you have not got. You need to be happy in order to give happiness to others. Showing people you are happy is the best gift you can give them. It is one of the most effective ways to make a positive difference in this world for yourself and others.

Happiness is truly the gift that keeps on giving. A smile passed along from you to someone else can keep being passed along. A smile is infectious, so you can create a happiness epidemic. People know when you are happy and they connect with it. It is the happiness within you that is most important.

Instead of wishing people happiness, show them happiness by Being Happy. Your Happiness Decision and the happiness you experience brightens the world! Many people tell me they would like their life to make a difference. Being happy does more to change the world, then many other things you can do. Even people who are dedicated to helping others can do so much more to help, when they are being happy. Anything you do with happiness is the greatest way to serve people.

Happiness will also make you healthier, so share the joy with everyone! Be fair to yourself and to everyone around you; make the Happiness Decision and choose a Happy New Year!

HAPPY YET?

BE HAPPY ZONE
By Lionel Ketchian

I bought an old book called Happiness by Hugh Black; it was published in 1911. That's 98 years ago. It was a really good book. I wondered why we haven't learned the lessons of happiness in all these years.

Another book by the same title, Happiness by William Lyon Phelps, published in 1927, also contains valuable ways to live. For example he says, "The principle of happiness should be like the principle of virtue; it should not be dependent on things, but be a part of personality." This puts happiness in its place, within the individual, not outside.

If almost 100 years is not enough time to look back, then let's look back 2,400 years. You remember Socrates, he said, "know thyself." He also talks a great deal about happiness. He wrote: "Not only is knowledge virtue, but virtue itself is identical with happiness, for a man who is doing what is right is doing that which is for his own good, resulting in happiness."

Socrates thought that life's highest good was happiness. He said: "Man pursues a great variety of goals, but the one he seeks as his ultimate end is happiness. Everything else is a means not an end." Money is only good for buying things, which gives people the outer feeling of happiness. Socrates said, "For, in a word, everything that we choose we choose for the sake of something else -- except happiness, which is an end in itself."

My point is that happiness is one of the most important and least understood values we have as a human race! It has been around for over 2,400 years but has not been understood. Take a look at any negative headline in the paper today. Someone kills another or a student in school does something terrible. We want so much to understand their reason for doing what they do. Do you want the reason? Unhappiness is the real reason.

We are living in a more positive and more proactive world. Personal responsibility is better understood. Happiness is being mastered for what it is, a cause, not an effect. We have lived with happiness as being the effect of something else for too long. Get up in the morning choosing to be happy; that cannot be taken away from you. Even if you found it, the effect it would have on you would be to make you unhappy. If the thing you have makes you happy, than the fear of losing it, and not wanting to lose it will make you unhappy.

Living with happiness, as a cause, rather than an effect, will give you everything you've dreamed of in life. I am talking about unconditional happiness. Become a thermostat, so you can control your own temperature. Most people are like a thermometer, allowing themselves to be affected by outside circumstances. Get up in the morning, use your decision to be happy as the cause of experiencing happiness for the day, and for the rest of your life. Where you put your attention is what you will experience. If your attention is on happiness it will expand, and you will experience it. Happiness can't happen when you place its source outside yourself, it must come from within.

People need to understand that they can be responsible for their own feelings. They have a choice to be happy or unhappy, regardless of what is happening in their life. Understanding this choice would positively impact the individual and the world would be better for it. Society is not teaching people the benefits of happiness, and it should be. Happiness should be in every school. The rewards of learning happiness would change the world.

Interested in living your life with happiness? You need to practice being happy. It is what you want; it is what you need. It is what the world needs right now, more than anything else. It's your choice. If you want to do good or be good...be happy. Not all good people are happy, but happy people are good, and they do a lot of good for others, because they are happy.

Are you happy yet? Be Smart, Be Happy! Your time has come! Welcome to the Happiness Zone!

Lionel Ketchian is the founder of the Happiness Club and can be reached at PrintLRK@aol.com. The website is www.HappinessClub.com.

JOIN US LIVE AT THE WESTPORT, CT. BARNES & NOBLE BOOK SHOP

Join Vishwa Prakash and Lionel Ketchian and hear us both speak and experience some Laughter Yoga for yourself.

Vishwa is the author of a spiritual book called: Who Stole my Soul.

Brian Tracy, the author of Maximum Achievement, Psychology Of Achievement says: "This thought-provoking, insightful book will give you the tools you need to live a more purpose-filled life."

Dr. Christiane Northrup, M.D., internationally renowned author of several New York Times bestsellers including Mother-Daughter Wisdom, Women's Wisdom writes: "Who Stole my Soul is beautifully written, very engaging and enlightening. It's a gem!"

Meet us at the Barnes & Noble bookshop at the Post Plaza Shopping Center, Post Road East, Westport, Connecticut, 06880. Vishwa will be having a book signing on Thursday, November 12th at 6:30 PM.

Vishwa is the "laughing guru" of New York and runs an active laughter club at his office. His website is: www.yogalaff.com & www.vishwaprakash.com

See you there!!!